How much body fat you have, what number you are on a scale, what dress size you are, none of that defines your worth. Let me just repeat that for you. Your worth is NOT dependent on your weight. Your worth is not dependent on your size.
The appearance of your body does not determine your worth.
This may be in complete contrast to what you see online, in magazines and diet books. We are led to believe (from a very young age), that how we look is overwhelmingly important. We are often led to believe that if we don’t look a certain way, then we aren’t good enough, we don’t fit in, we won’t be valued. Then come the messages:
You need to lose weight
You need to fit into a size 10
You need to stop eating so much food
You need to start exercising more
You need to prioritise calories in vs calories out
You need to lose weight in order to be happy
These are messages we see in mainstream media all the time. This is what we hear in health and fitness constantly – that its not ok to be satisfied with how you look, you can always look better. You can always lose weight. If you lose weight you will find happiness. The problem with this is this message is it is NOT healthy. It puts our happiness into the future. It increases our insecurities. It makes us feel unworthy as we are.
We need to stop valuing ourselves based on what size jeans we fit in to. We need to stop saying “I’ll finally be happy once I reach my goal weight!” because there’s a good chance you won’t be happy. You’ll more than likely find something else that needs to be “improved” or changed to focus on. And so the cycle of self hate, abuse and shame will continue. It holds us back as humans.
If you do reach your goal of a lower body weight, that does not increase your value as a human. Likewise, if you fail to achieve your goal that does not decrease your value. All it means is that the path you took to shape shift didn’t work, so you need to take the learning from that experience and move on.
Stop valuing yourself and basing your self worth on a set of numbers or sizes.
Let me point out that wanting to lose a few kgs or having a substantial amount of weight to lose does not make you an inferior person. There is no correlation to worth. In contrast, being a healthy body weight, or possessing some kind of unique, amazing physical endowments or that amazing metabolism that keeps weight stabilised doesn’t make you superior to anyone else either.
There is no wrong way to have a body.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to shape shift, it’s your body, you can do what you like with it, however what is wrong is valuing yourself based on a number. Numbers don’t define you.
What would happen if we used health and movement as a tool to become the best version of ourselves? The happiest version of ourselves?
What if we did these things to improve our quality of life and discover the amazing things our bodies can do?
What would happen if we valued ourselves by what we do in our everyday lives, strive to do a bit better each day, and encourage others to do the same?
What if we focused on becoming more instead of trying to be less?
What if, instead of being hyper critical about ourselves, we liberally practiced self-compassion? How much better would that feel?
Use health and movement to live a good quality life, a well rounded life. Use measures like the value you bring to others, how you treat others, how you treat yourself, what you can contribute to the world, to assess your self worth – not a number on a scale.
So let me just remind you again, your worth does not increase as your size decreases.